A Break from Bruce

After a night of tossing and turning and an entire day of staying inside, shunning my public and hiding my sleep-deprived pallor, I finally hit upon a solution. Normally, I do my best thinking at Barneys or Bergdorf’s, but tonight, I was steeping in a bubble bath, avoiding Bruce’s phone calls, when it hit me. Perhaps Bruce and I weren’t incompatible after all. Maybe, he was sick, and his nose didn’t work properly. He could have a cold or allergies or something! I immediately jumped out of the bathtub, put on a cute ensemble, and called Bruce back. When I suggested that he might need to seek some professional help, he laughed in the way that he has that always used to make me melt. Only this time, it made me mad. Clearly, he wasn’t taking this seriously. I calmly explained that the future of our relationship depended on getting to the bottom of the problem with his very attractive but otherwise defective nose. I told him that we needed some time apart. Reluctantly, he agreed, and promised not to call me until the same time tomorrow night. (I know it seems pretty extreme to deprive Bruce of my presence for a whole 24 hours, but he needs to understand how serious the situation is). After I hung up, I was crushed, because it seemed I had oversimplified what appeared to be a much bigger problem. Tomorrow, I needed to tackle this problem from a different perspective. Maybe Barneys, and not the bathtub…